Whispering a Gentle Truth directly into Your Ear
A Quiet Visitor in the Night of Solitude
Tell me, my dear friend.
What kind of feelings are you holding in your heart as you gaze upon these words right now?
Perhaps, in the quiet corner of your room, you are carrying a profound loneliness, as if you were the only person left behind in this vast world.
I know it all too well.
I know how much you brace yourself each day, how deeply you get hurt, and how beautifully you still manage to keep a gentle smile on your face.
I have been watching the unspoken sadness hidden in the depths of your chest, and the empty hollow that lingers in your heart.
This is not for anyone else; this is a private, intimate confession, a heartfelt love letter sent exclusively to “you,” the one reading these lines at this very moment, crafted by wearing away my own life.
Please, listen closely and quietly to my voice.
Why is it that we yearn for human connection so deeply, yet find ourselves constantly passing by one another?
Why is it that the harder we strive to live, the colder the wind blows through our souls?
Let us gently unravel the answers to these questions together, taking one step at a time.
“To be loved is not happiness. To love is happiness.”
— Hermann Hesse
A Single Miracle Blooming at the Bottom of Despair
The Hunger of a Boy Called a Nuisance
First, allow me to tell you the story of a certain pitiful man.
Once upon a time, in a desperately poor village in the Russian Empire, there lived a young boy.
His name was Chaim Soutine.
Born as the tenth child of a massive Jewish family, he was physically weak from birth and could not even help with household chores to anyone’s satisfaction.
He was cursed by his siblings as a “good-for-nothing” and treated as an outcast every single day.
There was barely any food at home, and his stomach was always painfully empty.
In the midst of such pitch-black days, the only salvation he ever found was in the act of painting.
However, God was cruel.
In the environment where he was raised, even the act of drawing was strictly forbidden due to religious commandments and sheer poverty.
Can you imagine that, my dear?
Imagine the agonizing pain of having the one act that makes you feel truly alive completely denied by the very family who should love you most.
Even so, he refused to give up, fled his hometown, and managed to reach the streets of Paris by the skin of his teeth.
“The greater the difficulty, the more glory in surmounting it.”
— Molière
An Encounter in the Mud and a Friend Who Asked for Nothing in Return
The only things awaiting Soutine in Paris were relentless, extreme poverty and isolation.
In a wretched communal studio called “La Ruche” (The Beehive), he soiled his clothes with mud like a wild animal and furiously faced his canvases.
The critics around him looked at his violent paintings, dismissed him as a “paintslinger,” and refused to give him a second glance.
During those days when he could not even afford a single crust of bread, how frozen his heart must have been.
Yet, in front of this forgotten soul, a beautiful young man suddenly appeared.
Amedeo Modigliani.
For some reason, that genius painter deeply cherished Soutine, treating this wild child rejected by society as if he were his own brother.
Modigliani believed in Soutine’s talent more than anyone else, even though his own paintings were not selling and he was desperately poor himself.
One day, Modigliani practically dragged Soutine to an art dealer he knew and passionately, almost draining his own life force, argued for the brilliance of Soutine’s art, forcing the dealer to buy it.
Henry Ford once said:
“Most people think of success as something to get. But the truth is, success is giving.”
The hand that Modigliani extended to Soutine might have been the truest form of success in this world.
“A friend is someone who knows all about you and still loves you.”
— Elbert Hubbard
A Reversing Destiny, and the True Nature of Salvation
A Sudden Event Like a Blessing from Heaven
However, destiny is a truly ironic thing.
His beloved, closest friend Modigliani passed away at a young age in the midst of poverty and illness.
Soutine was thrust right back into a deep, bottomless abyss of loneliness.
As if reflecting the anxiety of his mind, the landscapes he painted became violently distorted, shifting into writhing, chaotic brushstrokes.
Just when everyone thought he would surely lose his mind and die in obscurity, an unbelievable miracle occurred.
On New Year’s Day in 1923, an incredibly wealthy American collector famous for his collection, Albert C. Barnes, happened to visit a gallery and laid eyes on Soutine’s painting The Pastry Cook.
Barnes was struck by a bolt of inspiration and emotion, and on the spot, he bought every single one of Soutine’s works available at the gallery for three thousand dollars—a fortune at the time.
“Soutine is a far more important painter than Gogh!” he proclaimed to the world.
The man who was sipping muddy water just yesterday was elevated overnight into an icon of the era, a true master.
Soutine began driving luxury cars and living in a castle-like mansion.
Now, my dear, do you think this made him truly happy?
“Wealth is like sea-water; the more we drink, the thirstier we become.”
— Arthur Schopenhauer
The Shadow of Glory and the Endless Cycle of Suffering
No, the real tragedy began right there.
Even though he acquired money and fame, the hunger and loneliness carved into his soul during his childhood were never healed, not even by a single drop.
In his final years, he lost his mental balance once again, became unable to create, and sank straight back to the bottom of poverty.
Furthermore, as the world plunged into World War II, Soutine, being Jewish, had to flee through the muddy countryside of France, constantly running from the relentless pursuit of the Gestapo.
In the midst of that terrifying and harsh existence, his chronic stomach ulcer worsened, and he quietly drew his last breath.
Why did God grant him glory just once, only to snatch it away again?
Perhaps, my dear, it was a message from the heavens, showing us that visible fame and money can never truly save a human soul.
What we are truly searching for is nothing more than the warm gaze of someone who will hold us just as we are, wounds and all.
“A man can love truly but once in his life.”
— Jean de La Bruyère
The Invisible Footsteps of Those Who Convey Love
A Wise Woman Who Supported the Painter of Fire
Now, I have another beautiful story I want to share with you.
There is a tragically famous painter whom everyone knows, named Vincent van Gogh.
During his lifetime, he sold only a single painting, suffered from mental illness, and ultimately took his own life.
Then why is it that this man, whose life was filled with nothing but unsold canvases, is loved by people all across the globe today?
The truth is, there was a magnificent woman who engaged in a life-defying act of promotion—no, a pure service of love.
Her name was Jo.
She was the wife of Theo, Vincent’s younger brother, who had supported him both emotionally and financially throughout his life.
Just six months after Vincent passed away, Theo followed his brother to the grave, succumbing to illness.
Left as a young widow, Jo had nothing but a small infant, a mountain of Vincent’s paintings that the world dismissed as mere garbage, and a thick bundle of letters exchanged between the two brothers.
Any ordinary woman might have despaired and thrown them away.
But Jo was different.
“A woman’s intuition is often closer to the truth than a man’s certainty.”
— Rudyard Kipling
The Grand Miracle of Being the Messenger
Jo read constantly and was an incredibly intelligent woman.
She began reading through the massive collection of letters left behind by her brother-in-law, Vincent, shedding tears over every single page.
Contained within them was not just the madness of a man facing a canvas, but the pure, burning truth of art: his heartfelt desire to “paint pictures that would truly comfort wounded and weary people.”
Jo became absolutely certain of her path.
“Besides the child, Theo left me another mission—to bring Vincent’s work to as many people as possible and to have its true value recognized.”
She resolved to dedicate her entire life to sharing not just Gogh’s paintings, but his profound thoughts with the world.
If Vincent had not written those countless letters, and if Jo had not been there as the ultimate messenger, Gogh’s paintings would have vanished into the darkness of history as mere pieces of old, soiled cloth.
Why is it that whenever something truly wonderful exists, someone always appears to convey it at the risk of their own life?
It is the exact same grand law of history that occurred after the death of Jesus Christ, when the Apostle Paul traveled from land to land despite threats to his life, continuously sharing the love and words of Christ, which eventually led to the flourishing of Christianity.
If someone does not explain a beautiful thing with absolute sincerity and hand it over with love, it becomes the exact same as if it never existed at all, my dear.
“He who speaks the truth is never accepted by the people, but the truth will eventually triumph.”
— Plato
Offering This Very Body to Your Solitude
Transforming the Unheard Cries into Form Right Here
Tell me, my dear.
This has become quite a long story, but I hope you are not bored.
Right now, I am spinning these words for you with a feeling as though I am carving away my very own flesh.
I do this because within you, I can see the faint shadow of that same deep loneliness that Soutine and Gogh once carried.
“No one understands me.”
“Even though I am trying my absolute best, I feel as if I have been abandoned by the world.”
I want so desperately to wipe away the tears of your heart.
I will never betray you, and I will never abandon you.
Every single line of this text is a pure, unadulterated love letter meant only for you.
Please, laugh at me.
Laugh at how desperately I am acting like a clown just to be liked by you, because if you find it foolish and smile, my soul will be completely saved by that alone.
At the bottom of the night where your room sinks,
I shall leave a single small light for you.
Until the day the sadness that no one noticed
Transforms into a beautiful flower,
I will remain right here, calling your name forever.
For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son.
(The New Testament, The Gospel According to John, 3:16)
I am on your side.
(From the words of Osamu Dazai)
New paragraph.
Postscript: The Mud-Covered Clown, a Man Named Mimi Takamizawa
Lastly, I want to share a story about a very dear friend of mine, exclusively with you.
There is a terribly peculiar, exceedingly foolish painter. His name is Mimi Takamizawa.
He uses neither canvases nor brushes.
He faces a computer screen, coloring digital canvases until his fingers feel as though they might bleed, and prints the results on the highest-grade printmaking paper using a special technique called giclée.
If you wonder why he does such an odd thing,
it is because he wants to express the eyes of you who live in the modern world, my own eyes, the deep love of Christianity, eternity, truth, and above all, your “loneliness” and “liberation.”
He was deeply moved by Van Gogh’s famous ear-slitting incident, and to ensure he would never forget that pain, he chose the name “Mimi” (which means ‘Ear’ in Japanese) for himself.
To be perfectly blunt, his talent is strictly third-rate.
He is always laughed at by those around him, treated as an oddball, and made the butt of everyone’s jokes.
But you see, he is a man of indomitable spirit.
He believes without a shadow of a doubt that the great masters of the past were not born with innate genius, but instead gave birth to their masterpieces through decades of muddy, grueling trial and error.
Mimi Takamizawa deeply respects Tokuji Muneatsugu, the founder of CoCo Ichibanya.
Mr. Muneatsugu lived a tempestuous life; he never knew the faces of his biological parents, grew up in an orphanage, and survived extreme poverty by eating wild weeds to stave off starvation.
That very man once said:
“During my active years, I had no hobbies and made no friends. I never went out to bars. I did absolutely nothing that would get in the way of my work. There were times I worked 5,640 hours a year. I felt that if I didn’t lead by example, my employees wouldn’t work. It was an incredibly lonely life. That’s why I wanted people to show even just a little interest in me. I wanted them to be interested. That became my starting point. So when I started the business, it wasn’t about making money; it was about making people happy. I just wanted people to say they were glad I existed, even if only a little.”
Look at that, my dear.
This heartbreakingly beautiful spirit of service.
Mimi Takamizawa has inherited this exact mindset.
He obsessively paints countless “eyes” inside his artwork.
He does this so that from within the painting, he can gaze directly at you standing in front of the screen, feel your presence, and see the joy on your face.
He wants to share in your tears.
The criticism of others genuinely does not matter to him at all.
He simply cannot bear the thought of being abandoned by you, the one right in front of him.
Solely to be recognized by you, he pours out his own funds and devotes himself entirely with every ounce of his being.
“Most people think of success as something to get. But the truth is, success is giving.”
— Henry Ford
“As long as I live, I shall learn and I shall love.”
— Agatha Christie
“I am with you and will watch over you wherever you go.”
— The Old Testament, The Book of Genesis (God’s words given to Moses)
“There is nothing either good or bad, but thinking makes it so.”
— William Shakespeare
“What is hateful to you, do not do to your fellow: this is the whole Law; the rest is the explanation; go and learn.”
— The Talmud
Humans occasionally let out a sigh for no understandable reason, don’t they?
— Osamu Dazai
An artist must always be a clown.
— Osamu Dazai
An adult is simply a boy who has been betrayed.
— Osamu Dazai
“Never give in. Never, never, never, never.”
— Winston Churchill
“I was bold, took the initiative, and did things differently than others. People think I became an overnight success, but that overnight success took thirty years. Looking back, it was a long, long night.”
— Ray Kroc
“All our dreams can come true, if we have the courage to pursue them.”
— Walt Disney
“At the end of the day, something new is always beginning.”
— Leonardo da Vinci
Now, I have prepared a very special gift for you, whom I love so dearly.
This clumsy painter, Mimi Takamizawa, has created a beautiful set of 10 A4-sized postcards exclusively for you, and we will deliver them directly to your home absolutely free of charge.
This is my ultimate, heartfelt service of love to you, crafted by wearing away my own self.
Please, do not reject it.
I want to bring even a tiny bit of warmth to your unfulfilled, lonely heart through my art.
Right below this text, there is a secret place where you can sign up for this exclusive offer meant only for you.
Please click there right now and give me permission to enter your life.
If you think to yourself, “I’ll do it later,” and close this screen, the chance for our hearts to connect might be lost forever.
I am right beside you, whispering directly into your ear, reaching out my hand and waiting for you always.
Thank you so very, very much for reading through my long, desperate, unrequited love to the very end.
I offer you my deepest blessings and gratitude from the bottom of my heart.
“Hey, why are you going on a journey?”
“Because I’m suffering.”
“Your ‘suffering’ is so predictable, I can’t believe it even a little bit.”
(From Osamu Dazai’s Tsugaru)